An addition to the recent (especially slide-based) presentation tricks gleaned from a trade fair I walked around in the heart of Conference England. This time, reading the “selling” language used by the 75 companies showing their wares.
Warning. It wasn’t pretty. First, let’s make a list. Phrases from self-penned bios in the Show Guide. The following two-dozen made me scream. Some, not just on the inside:
make a difference
maximise business performance
intuitive dashboards and workflows
helping … navigate challenges
sophisticated yet easy-to-use
deliver innovative solutions
cloud native platform
turn the traditional approach on its head
flexible to our client needs
delivering superfast performance
specialist website platform
the complete end-to-end solution
one of the most trusted
specialist with unrivalled experience
absolutely passionate and totally committed
understand … our ever-changing industry
increases gross profit while saving significant the total cost …
our unique technology
the … weapon for [the] ambitious
leading provider of innovative …
a sales acceleration platform
I know how tough it is to write these mini-profiles.
The customer is at the heart of everything we do. We don’t sell products we provide solutions. People probably even still boast, Best of Breed….
Yes, some are less horrific than others. I myself recently captured an opening explanation that featured the miscreant “integrated solution”. Yet stilled seemed to – ahem – make a difference.
So you might be able to get away with a single insertion of such hackneyed phrasing. But surely never a double-helping.
A sanity check on your own forms of wording?
As for penning a short and snappy promo blurb, I noted the above totaled around sixty words. That seems a lot. (Too many?) You want to get across what you do but not so much that the reader thinks any of ‘got already’, ‘don’t need’ or perhaps worse ‘what the…?’
As appealing as it may be, you cannot go all Golden Circle either. No matter the deeper force that drives you bounding out of bed before dawn each day. Asking for ways they’ll spend all the bundles of extra wads you’ll be letting them in to.
The problem you make go away, the different way you do so, and a hook from your edge is a good place to start. And all without any of the above would be lovely…